Friends at Work, or Fraternization at the Office
Policies About Relationships in the Workplace Vary, but Remain
Aug 21, 2009
What is fraternizing? According to The American Heritage Dictionary, to fraternize is to associate with others in a brotherly or congenial way. In other words, to fraternize is to be involved with someone in a friendly way, to be friends or lovers. Being someone’s friend or lover seems harmless, so why can it result in a firing or court martial?
Fraternization can be used to describe friendship among peers of equal standing, but it is usually used to refer to being in a personal relationship with a person who has a different rank or standing. Often, when the relationship between two people of different rank interferes with work, or might interfere with work, it’s called fraternization.
In the military, fraternization was traditionally viewed as occurring between officers and enlisted persons. It can also occur when each party involved is an officer, or among enlisted members of different rank. In the workplace, fraternization occurs between superiors and subordinates. In any case, the relationship might be platonic (just friends) or it might be romantic (lovers).
Fraternization – having a personal relationship with a person who is on a different level. That definition seems simple enough, but what about examples? What is fraternization? What qualifies? What does it look like?
Examples of Fraternization - High Potential for Trouble
- The manager and the employees go to a bar together after work.
- The boss and the secretary have a sexual relationship.
- A professor joins in on poker night on campus.
- A captain and a private have dinner together.
- A teacher goes to parties with his high school students.
Acceptable Behavior, Usually Not Fraternization
- The manager is having lunch at a restaurant, and some employees also happen to be having lunch there.
- The boss calls the administrative assistant at home about a work assignment.
- A teacher runs into a student in public, the student asks some questions and they have a conversation.
- Peers socializing after work may or may not be forbidden. Policy may vary from one company to another. The employee handbook should explain the company's fraternization policy.
Many organizations forbid fraternization, or being involved socially or romantically with anyone who has a different level of seniority. The military has long been well-known for banning fraternization. Many people think that this military policy is outdated, but there are reasons for the ban.
Fraternizing can lead to favoritism – treating some people better than others, allowing some people to get away with breaking the rules or with neglecting to perform duties properly. Favoritism can result in negatives such as poor decisions, low morale, and a disrupted work environment.
In order to prevent these and other problems, many organizations forbid fraternization. In the workplace, this means that managers cannot socialize with their subordinates. In organizations that forbid fraternization, termination is often the consequence if the fraternization is discovered. Most would agree that it isn’t worth getting fired over a game of cards after work.
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